Wednesday, January 4, 2012


I have so many questions and very few of them have answers. Sometimes I feel as if the questions will overtake me.

Why Jimmy of all the husbands in the world?

Why not a man who was beating his wife and children?

Why is this my cross to bear?

Why am I left with no children?

Why was there no warning that Jimmy would pass away on July 15th?

Why am I in Houston with no family?

Why are there people that refuse to talk to me now that Jimmy is gone?

Why did God not take me in place of Jimmy (I would have gladly given my life for his)?

Why do I feel worse 5 1/2 months later then the day he passed away?

Why does it feel like I was torn in half with a gaping hole that is left to be healed?

Why do I have to see couples together everywhere I go?

Why do I have to start this year being a widow?

Why was Jimmy not healed here on Earth?

Why did God let me meet him marry him and then take him away so soon?

Why give me true love only to rip it out from under me?

Why me?


The only answer I have from the whole list is why I am left with no children...I asked God to not make me a single mother. He showed me His mercy in that small way...that I would not become a single mother. Thank you Lord for this small blessing. I pray that the LORD Himself give me comfort even through all the questions. I know that I might not ever know the answers until I am with Jesus and I have to become content with that.

1 comment:

  1. Praying for you Lisa, and that the Lord gives you peace even if you can't have answers.